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Empath: The Myths, The Lies, and Finally The Truths - and How to Thrive as an Empath



It’s been said that more and more people are becoming increasingly sensitive. Which means - we‘re evolving as a species. We’re becoming more aware of how our thoughts and actions hurt others and ourselves.

That said, there has always a small percentage of each population over the eons that can be called empath. An empath is defined as someone “who experiences the emotions of others: a person who has empathy for others” (Merriam-Webster Dictionary). For the most part, that definition is correct. But there’s a lot more to it than that, and it can get a lot more confusing than that.

First, What an Empath is Not

There’s a book that came out a few years ago about the Highly Sensitive Person. The way that book describes it is accurate, but it refers to a personality type. Rather than a spiritual gift. That book describes various coping strategies for being a highly sensitive person. Sure, they work. But they turn you into someone who lives a restricted life. Rather than someone who is thriving with that ability. Not desirable.

The thing that this book fails to realize is that someone can become a highly sensitive person due to health issues. In particular, a very toxic body and overloaded liver will lead to a lot of the benchmarks of a highly sensitive person the author notes. Also, if you’re dealing with rampant viruses such as the Epstein-Barr virus, your nervous system will be shot causing these types of sensitivities. In particular what the author notes:

  • Are you easily overwhelmed by such things as bright lights, strong smells, coarse fabrics, or sirens nearby?

  • Do you get rattled when you have a lot to do in a short amount of time?

  • Do you need to withdraw during busy days, into bed or a darkened room or some other place where you can have privacy and relief from the situation?

So to say: ‘oh I'm a highly sensitive person person because I have these hallmarks,’ and leave at that - is dangerous. Because these ‘hallmarks’ could actually be caused by a sick body. Thus, an empath is not just a highly sensitive person. Also, an empath has great awareness of certain things - rather than just random sensitivity that could be caused by yet unknown health issues.

Health Issues To Be Aware Of

  • Do you know that mold in the body & brain can make you pretty loopy? It can make you angry, delusional, and paranoid. It can also give you hallucinations.

  • Do you know that viruses can damage your nervous system to such an extent that you feel things more than normally, example extra sensitive to EMFs from electronics or even people! Our bodies do emit a certain type of EMF, and for some people, that can be unbearable if they have a weakened nervous system.

  • Do you know that non-beneficial bacteria and viruses and fungus in your body can actually influence your thoughts? They will have you think and crave that which helps them grow. Negative thoughts release certain kinds of hormones in your body - that is actually fuel for them - so it’s not just unhealthy foods.

So the first thing with any of these symptoms is, of course, to take care of your health. My favorite place to go is the Medical Medium books - if you’re dealing with something chronic that doctors have not been able to figure out. Once your health is sorted out, then it can become more clear if you are indeed an empath or not. Though you usually will know instinctively if you are one - even if you’re dealing with health issues.

If you’ve taken a ThetaHealing class with me, you’ll have learnt about waywards and fallens. Exposure to these through yourself or others that are around you also leads to extra sensitivity to other’s emotions and energies. So not exactly empathy, but an overwhelm of others’ stuff. Why this happens is because these beings damage your energetic bodies - causing them to be very permeable. Which means the negatives from others can come in very, very easily. So that's another area to heal in order to heal this issue. I’ve found that the most permanent way to heal this issue is to live a live of virtue - both in thought, beliefs, and action. You can find my list of virtues: HERE.

What Exactly Does it Mean to be An Empath

An empath is someone who can tell exactly how someone is feeling - because they feel it in their own body. Where it gets confusing is that sometimes they are not aware what they are feeling is someone’s emotions and not their own.

Interestingly, empaths usually feel others’ negative emotions. And not positive ones. They also are able to tell if someone is in pain - even if they are smiling and pretending that everything is okay. And no one else can tell there’s something wrong with that person.

An empath’s life is extremely challenging, until they can learn to master this skill they have. It takes a lot of energy to be an empath and to simply just function on a day-to-basis. At the end of each day, an empath is drained and will usually need to crawl into bed to recover from the day. Which means an empath usually is not living the full life they want. They seem to be operating and existing just to be a processor for others’ lives and emotions. A sort of energetic cinderella.

What is the Purpose of Being An Empath

To be close to God/the Creator. That is the number one purpose of being an empath. The second is, of course, the obvious - to be able to help others or to even be driven to help others. Service to others is one of the greatest virtues there is.

Being an empath helps you be close to Creator through feeling and emotions. Spiritual experiences typically require a great depth or sensitivity of feeling. If you can’t feel, you’re not going to be able to feel your connection to Creator - though it is always there. And you need that feeling in order to feel close to God. Feeling close to God helps you stay on your path of your life purpose - and not get sucked into distractions all around you.

Being an empath also helps you understand yourself better through your lifetime - especially as you grow and evolve. The more you understand yourself, the more you let yourself do the things that bring you joy. That make your heart sing. And stay away from things and people that do the opposite.

Life of an Empath: A Great Responsibility

The number one complaint of empaths is the seeming inability to live their own lives for themselves. Always feeling other people’s energies and emotions - to the point of not even knowing if it is theirs. Empaths seem to always have a dark cloud above them - until they learn to master this skill.

Being an empath is a skill - just like any other. It is also a spiritual gift and responsibility.

When you are aware of the pain that someone is in, it can always feel like you’re responsible for helping them feel better. Even complete strangers! That is not quite so because everyone needs to be on their own pathway and to grow through their struggles. But your awareness is something you can use to help others - through things like getting certified and offering healing sessions. Then it can be a very powerful force for helping others.

But to go up to someone you know - or don’t know - and tell them you know what they’re struggling with. Well, they’ll probably expect you to also bear the burden of their pain - to be their savior. That’s doing no one a service. The best you can do is offer them a silent blessing and if you do take clients for healing sessions - give them your card so you can help them in that context.

If you struggle with letting go of the responsibility for others, then you do need to do some belief work through ThetaHealing.

Being an Empath - Gone Overboard

An empath is someone that, frankly, has bad boundaries. Can’t say to no to others. Puts herself/himself last always. And believes this is how God wants them to be. But it’s possible to develop healthy boundaries in life - energetically and in interactions - without having to lose your ability to be sensitive to other’s feelings. What you do with that information about others is totally up to you. But there’s never an obligation.

Some empaths have learnt to master this skill but most seem to not have. They just try to live with it - and it’s always a struggle.

What empaths don’t realize is that being an empath is a switch that you can turn on and off - and it’s okay to do so. You don’t always have to be aware of what others are feeling and care - it’s okay to turn that off sometimes so you can focus on yourself. God does not expect you to be a 24/7 7-11 for other people’s problems. God would not be cruel like that. God is actually a very high vibration being - the highest there is.

Having compassion for yourself and what you want to do in life is your priority. If your priority is to help others by being aware of their emotions and pains, then so be it. But then turn it into a constructive thing. Do this in sessions where you are compensated for this effort. Outside of sessions, give yourself permission to turn it off. And just allow yourself to enjoy your life.

Learn How to Turn It Off - At Will

The most effective way I’ve frankly found to learn to turn it off when you want is to use ThetaHealing - and you can join my next class to learn about that.

I also let it overrun my life because I believed that was what I came to do. But then it cost me my health and a lot of destruction - and it became clear to me that God would never ask me to do that to myself. That it was out of control, and it was crazy to allow it to continue in that way. That I needed to learn to master it.

It comes so easily, so to turn off that faucet takes some effort initially. The other thing is to learn to turn it off without shutting down - because that’s not useful or fun either. Learning to say no is the most powerful spiritual lesson there is.

Jesus helped the downtrodden and broken. But he also knew how to say no. At no point in time did he do something to harm his gifts - until a point in time when he had to follow his life path to its completion. But during his life, he said no many times. To those that were teaching others falsehoods and taking advantage of others. He said no often every time he stood up and spoke the controversial truth. He had strong boundaries. He was not a wimp. And he decided and determined how to live his life - no other human did this for him.

The funny thing is empaths tend to attract narcissists - both in romantic relationships and in friendships/work relationships. What does that say? Empaths have a very hard time saying no. Empaths have a hard time with boundaries. Many don’t even have this concept of no in their cells’ receptors. They’ve never said no. But that is mistreating yourself - which is God’s greatest gift to you. The gift of you.

If you aren’t able to say no - it may not be your fault. It could be because you were abused as a child and if you tried to fight back - you got into more trouble and pain. So your voice was completely shut down and you complied so you could keep yourself as safe as possible. But it’s now time to take responsibility for your life and to learn this important skill.

  1. You need to learn healthy boundaries for yourself.

This starts by deciding what you want and what you’re not okay with. It’s really important to write this down initially so your subconscious mind also is on notice. Then you need to take action every time someone does something you are not okay with - and speak up. Initially, you’re going to have a lot of fear in your body when you do this. But you do it anyways, and you can use ThetaHealing to help remove that fear. With time, it becomes very easy to do. You also learn how to speak up for yourself without doing damage to others. But, initially, it might get messy as you learn this skill. AND THAT IS OKAY. It is your right to learn this skill.

2) You never ever, ever, ever again compromise on who you are or what is important to you in life.

We tend to compromise ourselves, our values, and what is important to us - so as not to upset anyone. And to not drive people away. Guess what - if the people in your life are going to leave because you’re being your true self - they don’t deserve to be in your life anyway! It’s the most loving thing to do to let them leave or even ‘drive them away’ just by being your true self.

Again, you write a list of what is important to you - and who you really are - the person that God created at a soul level. And never again compromise on these things. If someone tells you: “oh, it’s okay, everyone is doing it.” Walk away immediately. Don’t overthink or give anyone a ‘chance.’ The only person you’re obligated to give a chance is yourself. Giving people ‘a chance’ can get you in a lot of trouble and far away from who you really are.

3) Speak Up.

If you see a kid being mistreated by his mom while you’re at the grocery store, speak up. Even if you get yelled at. When someone is mistreating you - speak up. When something unethical is happening - instead of thinking ‘it’s none of my business’ - speak up!

By speaking up in important situation like this, it becomes easier for you to not allow your brain to just automatically let anyone cross your boundaries - especially emotionally or energetically.

4) Master your Thoughts.

Incessant thoughts about anyone actually puts their energy in your space. Odds are, there’s a part of you that wants to fix them. And that’s why you have incessant thoughts about them and can’t let them go emotionally - even though they’re really bad for you. ThetaHealing can help you with incessant thoughts - but also meditating every single day helps you have healthy control over what you think and do - and your emotional and energetic state.


With these steps, you are retraining your subconscious and teaching it healthy boundaries. Which means, you’ll no longer automatically take in people’s emotions or energies. Instead, if you want to know how someone is feeling, you can ask yourself to feel that. But it doesn’t just happen automatically anymore like an open faucet that’s constantly leaking water. Instead, you get to turn the faucet on when it’s right and appropriate for you.


How to Master This Skill

Empaths tend to be over givers. Because they can feel others’ pain so much and intensely, and they just want to help make it better. But, the trick to mastering this skill is to know when you need to focus on your own goals - and when it’s appropriate to help others.

The thing is, some individuals need tough love in order to truly find their path and soul purpose. And ultimately happiness. If you take everyone’s pain away instantly - you don’t allow them the opportunity to work, strive, pursue, and accomplish. There’s a lot of learning and growth that happens in the struggle that is critical for each soul. And it is not right to take that away from anyone.


It is also not right to put others’ goals or well-being ahead of your own goals. You have a purpose here, and those need to be accomplished for your own development. So if helping others in a specific way takes away from that, then it is not necessarily the right path for you. Unless helping others in that way helps your path.


So while someone who has a victim mentality and believes they are always a victim might want you to rescue them - that might not actually be the right thing for them. If you want to learn how to differentiate between these two scenarios, take my next ThetaHealing class, and I’ll teach you how!


In order to master your empathic abilities, you’ll need to first understand it fully. Hopefully, this articles helps with you that. Then you’ll need to make a decision to take the steps to develop strong boundaries, as I noted above under: Learn How to Turn It Off - At Will. Lastly, you’ll need to learn and understand where you want to use this gift. If you are drawn to offering healing sessions for clients - that’s a great step. Or perhaps you’ll want to start a blog. In some way, you’ll need to use your gift to be of service to others. That’s when the true mastery of it comes in.


Being An Empath is a Choice - You Don’t Have to be One If You Don’t Want To

I believe that everyone has the ability to be an empath - if they wanted. Just like everyone is born with great intuitive abilities. The common thread among empaths is that they typically had very tough, even abusive childhoods. So they further developed their ability to know and feel the emotions of others - as a safety mechanism. So they can know what their caretakers are feeling in each moment - and to stay away or hide if they are in a foul or abusive mood. It is a great survival skill. So, it is something that can be greatly developed, due to these scenarios.


A child that grew up in a safe, loving environment may not be interested in knowing what or how others feel. Because they are safe and accepted. Certainly, they can be or become an empath - but it is highly unlikely in those scenarios because it is not necessarily needed. I know it’s still possible to be an empath even if born into great circumstances because of one story. The stories about the Buddha growing up - he was shielded from all bad things. When he accidentally ran into someone poor as an adult, it is reported that he felt great pain over that/he felt their pain. And so it is definitely possible to become an empath even after a positive childhood.


With time though, this ability can become overactive and make you sick. If you’re constantly taking in other people’s emotions and energies. First, you can easily forget who you really are. Secondly, what you typically pick up are the negatives, and that can make you extremely sick - physically and energetically. It wears down on your body over time. If you aren’t taking the best care of your body, then it’s even harder on your body.

It is a choice, but know that God gave you that ability for a reason - which is to connect to God deeply. Which can be hard to do when there are so many distractions in the world - most of them viewed as normal. But they all distance you from God. So God gave you this ability so you can always feel that connection. And you further developed it during tough times in your life. So I wouldn’t toss that ability away so fast. But rather learn to master it, as I highlighted above. It is like any skill - and you simply need to learn to use it to help you.


If you decide to toss it away, you will find that you will not feel like yourself. It’s like a huge part of you has died. So I would suggest no go down that route. Just know that you can be happy, healthy, and thriving fully as an empath.


The Future for Empaths

As more people become sensitive, and pretty much empathic, it’s going to be a whole new world we live in. So instead of cutting someone off in traffic or honking at someone who cuts you off in traffic, we’ll allow others forgiveness no matter what. Because at the end of the day - when you honk at someone who cuts you off in traffic or aren’t considerate to others - the only person you’re hurting is yourself. Negative emotions release negative hormones - and also make you sick emotionally, physically, and spiritually.

Which means that the world will hopefully become a less harsh place for empaths to live in. But don’t wait till that happens. Work on mastering this skill today and see the amazing places it takes you.


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